Online Love

I Don’t Date Short Men


I don’t date men that are shorter than I am. Point blank. Period.

The rule is : if I can see Paris, Rome and France over your head (with no visual obstruction), it’s not going to work. It’s just not. Some may find this a bit shallow. *shrugs* It probably is. However, until the day that I’m fifty years old and forced to settle for any wanker that comes my way, I will proudly have my preferences!

You have to understand, I wear heels 80% of the time. This usually puts me at a wonderful 5 feet and nine inches. On top of that, I have long legs which make me look taller than I am. I can not date someone that’s 5’4. I’d literally hover over them like an alien spacecraft. That’s neither cute nor courteous!

On to the point of my story. On Friday I went on a date with someone that I met on OkCupid. His profile stated, as clear as an LA summer day, that he was 5’9.


When I arrived for dinner, he had already been seated (the con started before I even got there!). I sat down and we ate. When it was all over, we both stood up and I noticed that he was not the height he had claimed to be. He stood no higher than five feet and four inches! This is not a hyperbole people! He seriously fell slightly short of my bosom (<–ok this one’s a hyperbole). So many questions ran through my head, some of which were  :

1. Where is the rest of you? And will it be joining us later? Because *looks him up and down* I can’t.

2. Why lie? Did you not think that I would realize upon meeting you that you are NOT even in the vicinity of 5’9?

*sigh* I was so done with him after that point. Had he told the truth on his profile, I would not have wasted either of our time by going on a date. I DON’T date men that are shorter than I am. I don’t care how awesome of a personality a guy has. I just don’t do it. Point blank. Period!

Photo courtesy of StockImages – FreeDigitalPhotos

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  • kofybean
    03/29/2014 at 5:58 PM

    You wear heels 80% of the time? You are either lying or have really bad feet.

    • Areyouondrugs
      04/04/2014 at 4:45 AM

      It’s actually more like 95%. So now where does that put me?